Ducklings!
I logged on this afternoon to hear strange rumors in guild chat about our guild leader quitting the game. “Whaaat?”, spake I, bewildered. Only on Thursday we were very close to completing an amazing run through some difficult bosses in TK and SSC… how could we be in such dire straits on Saturday? Logged on later that night to find that it was all true: Our guild leader had sharded her gear due to unspecified “Real Life” issues and her boyfriend (also a guild officer) was quitting the game, too. The other officer didn’t feel like continuing without his friends, so the guild would be disbanding.
DISBANDING?! Do you know, humble reader, how difficult it is to get 25 people to accomplish anything simultaneously in a video game?! If you’re still reading this without having died of a heart attack, you surely don’t. All my WoW-knowledgable readers… I killed them with paragraph #1.
I’m guildless, and my Wednesday, Thursday and Saturday nights are now completely free and blemishless. Surely this will revive my dating life, whee.
Excuse me a sec, I need to start drinking a liter of water to counteract the booze. Ah, much better.
So tonight, after muddling through some confusing, aimless and solution-free guild chat banter, I went out for drinks with a friend. We talked politics and WoW, coming to a few not-so-surprising conclusions:
- It’s unlikely that voters would ever have responded well to John Edward’s news that his wife has terminal cancer. Although it’s potentially a heroic underdog story where good triumphs over despair, in real life this is not a winning electoral arc. Bartenders with degrees in Communication Theory can tell you that was a loser, and that dropping out post-diagnosis was the only logical choice. Whatever sympathy one might have for Edwards — and we swim in those waters — is sucked down the drainspout of cold reality of the nature of the American electorate.
- Pear martinis — they can be good!
- Success at the 25-man level in Warcraft is an utter crapshoot. Skill, organization and gear — all are difficult to crystallize. When it all comes together, it can be fantastically fun, but you never know when it’s all going to collapse.
- “Mike Huckabee” — goddam but that’s funnier to say drunk than sober.
- Mitt Romney is certainly more likely to win the Republican nomination than anyone else. Republican voters aren’t crazy enough to vote for someone so clearly doomed at a national level (Huckles) nor can they conscience voting for someone they can’t stand (McCain) because of past betrayals. Giuliani has a barely plausible recovery strategy(2nd in Florida, stupid media bump), but only because the whole field is in such appalling disarray.
- The Hillary vs McCain race is the least interesting of the bunch. For fun, juiciness and excitement all us kids are clamoring for Huckabee vs Obama, ‘tho we expect to have our pony-wishes punished pretty dam’ hard behind the woodshed any minute now.
The new strategy — forged on the anvil of the hydroxyl group — is to reroll Horde toons on some barren unwelcoming server, wherein I fulfill my cradle-born dream of playing a tauren resto druid with the fabled and dizzying +5% stamina racial bonus. Fear my warstomp, puny Alliance!
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